A couple of months ago I had the greatest joyful time I’ve had in a long while. I flew west, into the desert and spent 3 days in a hotel with 1.000 women at the International Women’s Summit in Phoenix, Arizona (ok – a city in the desert). I listened with all my heart to be inspired, loved, challenged, stretched, encouraged and energized.
In this eye opening event, I got all of that and more. I didn’t have to be good, or look to make connections for business. I didn’t have to worry about being judged for what I said. I didn’t have to think about the challenges in my life. I just got to open up and absorb and be with energy that flowed from the stage and from each other. These women – Liz Gilbert, Lisa Nichols, Dr Tererai Trent, Cheryl Strayed, Laverne Cox, and others, bared their souls – talked and cried and yelled and danced and laughed and whispered their truths. All this was so that we, as women, would not just keep going, but to move through our lives with the joy we were meant to have.
While I was there, I allowed myself to be open, in each moment, and to connect – to ideas, and stories and beautiful women who have been through hell. I know that everyone carries around their “thing;” their ”story;” their “tragedy,” but it was so powerful to hear these human people talk and bare their souls so that others can learn and keep moving on through their grief and loss and battles of everyday life. We need to hear from strong women who are finding their joy so we can find ours as well. That is what makes leaders — woman or man. To be the leaders of our own lives. On our terms.
To hear Glennon Doyle Milton say “Self love is the opposite of self-control, and to “forget the balance” – what is important is “passion and self love.”
Cheryl Strayed said, “Open your heart. It’s the most important thing you can do with your life!”
It’s not about your job or title or making the bed everyday (which I do find satisfaction in the orderliness of it). It is about being “compelled to find a different version of yourself.”
When I flew back east, I entered my empty house and my challenging work. Instead of feeling sad or lonely, I looked for how to keep the energy going and listened to a podcast with Liz Gilbert (Magic Lessons) and Glennon and this is what was said:
“I am so tired of being good. I just want to be free!”
Whoa! Most of our lives we do what is expected by others. We don’t give ourselves permission to be bad or listen to our inner voice, which is always right. Maybe it is time to be bad. To do what our hearts yearn for. To be kind; be merciful and “be open to Serendipity – to Coincidence and Magic” – now this is what we are here for – to be free to be who we are. Everyday badness and goodness.
Reach deep down and pull out that courage and resilience we all have within. It is our reservoir of life for us to dip into whenever we need. And there are helping hands so we don’t need to do it all ourselves.
Go out and be bad. Then you get to be free to be who you are here to be.
If you are looking for an opportunity to dig deeper and find your own inner voice and joy, take the Love Yourself Scorecard(™). This tool is so you can find out how you are feeling about yourself and what you may need that is different. This is a great first step for discovering how you really want to spend each day – in joy, in discovery, in feeling alive. Click here to take the complimentary Scorecard today.
There is hardly one woman I know who doesn’t have some fairly high level of stress in their lives – especially women who work – who are in their own business or have a career. For a lot of us, being happy is inconsistent or elusive. As women, we still feel we must do it all – do it, give it, make it happen. This pressure is almost debilitating and it can become harmful to our overall health. We may experience a feeling that it is hard to breathe, develop a pattern of sleep problems, poor eating habits. Perhaps become sullen or angry, or depressed or worried. Sometimes our lives are unfulfilled or unpleasant because we are too pressured with responsibilities to enjoy life. We can almost be so unhappy that we get to a point where we realize we are in too much pain and something must change.