Originally posted 5/5/2014
I’ve been thinking about how we sometimes rely on others to make us happy, to have fun, to feel joy. If things don’t work out, we can so easily slip into the feeling of blaming others for our own lack of happiness. “I tried, but…” ” They always disappoint me…” ” He got me off to a bad start…” “I can’t find a job and it’s because of the Democrats, the Republicans, the Prez, my lousy school…” “Burger King doesn’t have anything good on the menu..” Ad infinitum really applies. We have endless possibilities of who and what to blame.
We get drilled into us by the typical ‘culprits’ – parents, friends, family, school, reporters, drama shows, and of course, politics. It is an endless and overwhelming culture of blame. On some level, it feels almost good to pick the best excuse we can. There – I am off the hook. Not my fault.
You get to choose a different way…
“With everything that has happened to you, you can either feel sorry for yourself or treat what has happened as a gift. Everything is either an opportunity to grow or an obstacle to keep you from growing. You get to choose.” ― Wayne W. Dyer
If you have feelings that your life is a disappointment – and it is so easy (almost instantaneous) to feel let down by others – notice when this happens and switch to a new behavior. Not TRY a new reaction, but actually CHOOSE something different and more nourishing.
Monday is a great day to start something new. So rather than feel lack of energy and bogged down by what lies ahead this week, take a new approach. Make your own fun. Acknowledge that YOU are ultimately responsible for YOU. No blaming others, and as importantly, no blaming yourself. Any kind of blame is just big of an excuse as for not being happy right now and being stuck in some level of pain.
Open the windows and let the light and air in. Choose joy. Look up at the sky. Take in the sound of the birds outside, of the winds moving things along, of children laughing. Life has gifts for us everyday, in every thing that happens to us. What will be fun for you today? Call up a long lost friend who makes you laugh. Treat yourself to ice cream. Sign up for a belly-dancing class (so much fun BTW). Have a Margarita for Cinco De Mayo. Travel in your head to your favorite place. Play your favorite song and put on your happy feet. Then, at the end of the day, remember how may times you get to smile (and help others around you smile as well). That is how to grown and love and be joyful. What better way is there to live today?
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